“Love is what we are born with. Fear is what we have learned here. The spiritual journey is the unlearning of fear and the acceptance of love back into our hearts.”
– Marianne Williamson
by Isha Garg
You have something now that was once my most treasured possession. You aren’t his first, nor was I. I had a hard time coming to terms with the fact that here was someone before me who had had him, to whom he had once whispered the words he whispers to me; someone he went to when his soul needed healing or the joy in his heart needed to be shared. I admit at times, when my mind had wandered for a second, loosening its grip on my heart, allowing it to hope I would be his last. I am not naïve, but with enough love, even the most deeply wounded hearts start to believe they can fly again. He gave me all that love, and even more. And for quite some time, I did fly.
I am not yet over him. In a way, I never will be. I will wonder if you wear
glasses, and when you take them off, if the sight of your eyes makes him melt as they did with me. I will wonder if he calls you the most beautiful woman on earth as well, and I will cringe in the possibility that he does, because the man that I know does not know how to love half-heartedly. He will go to any extent for you, and he will be fiercely possessive. And you know something? You will love every second of it, this possessiveness. He will protect you, he will daddy you over, and he will drown you in love.
I have one piece of advice for you.
Never take his drive away from him. It
is his fuel, it is the one thing that gives him the aggression to believe himself invincible. Believe in his drive, believe in his invincibility. Not that he can’t fall, but that there is no power on earth that can keep him from getting back up and going at it harder than ever before. Don’t take that away from him. If he loves you enough it will break him, if he doesn’t, it will make him bitter. He is an aggressive man. But it stems from the passion I am sure you adore. But he is as gentle as he is aggressive with the woman he loves. Deep down, he wants to love. He wants to give you every single joy in the world, and he will do anything in his power to see your face
light up from the way he loves.
He will be jealous of your past, and
yes, he will be unreasonable at times.
Be patient with him, because when you
are at your most unreasonable, he will
gather you in those arms that can
envelop your very soul, and not let you
go until you sigh out your grievances.
And he will take care of them for you.
You are his woman, he is the one you
can rely on; when nothing makes
sense, he will set it right, by himself.
He will never hurt you willingly, and if
he finds out he has hurt you
unintentionally, it will rip his heart out.
And God save a third person who dares
to attempt to hurt you. I was not
kidding when I said he is protective —
he cannot bear to see you sad.
Never sleep on a fight, because when
you wake up, you’ll find him awake,
because he can’t sleep on one. Never
block channels of communication,
never go that far away. It hurts him
more than he can tell you. If he cries in
front of you, let him. He needs it,
though he will never tell you. Know that
you’re the most special person in his
life if he can just put his head in your
shoulder and let things out. Do not try
to make him stop, just hold him.
Love him — it’s the most rewarding
experience you will have in your life.
Don’t impose conditions, and he will
make you feel emotions you didn’t
know existed. He will teach you of the
exact location of your heart, because
he will constantly be tugging at the
strings there, and it will ache for him
when he’s away. He will tell you stories:
listen to them. He has a wealth of
knowledge he doesn’t know what to do
with except share. There are aspects of
his childhood he loves, and those he
hates. Make him tell you both, because
the ones he loves are worth being a
part of, and the ones he hates drive
him in some manner.
Kiss him. Kiss him for the sake of
kissing him. Kiss him because his lips
are the softest thing on earth, because
kissing him feels like floating on wisps
of cotton candy and tastes even better.
Ask him to give you his superman hug,
but be careful, your body can not take
it for more than five seconds. Run your
finger down his back, you’ll find this
one spot that always makes him jump.
Hold hands, you will know how much it
means to him the first time you do.
Sometimes just put your head on his
chest to hear his heartbeat. Think your
own thoughts to the beat of his heart.
It will soothe your mind and heart. But
of course, you are with him now. You
know all these things. You love him,
and are intimately familiar with all his
quirks. You don’t need me to tell you
all of that. What I will tell you, though,
is that you’ve got the most precious
thing on earth with you, and you will
cherish it for all your life. Don’t lose it,
don’t waste it, and don’t squander it on
petty issues. Let him take you to a
world only he has access to. Love him,
and let him love you, and I assure you,
you will never be the same again.
Love has a bad reputation for breaking hearts and causing pain, when it isn’t love that is the culprit. Love with it’s euphoric joy cannot be blamed for the pain caused by devastation.
Love, has a bad reputation for breaking hearts and causing pain. When it isn’t Love.
It isn’t Love.
Loves does not hurt.
Love does not blind.
Love does not deceive.
Love, in it’s infinite purity takes the fall – for Hope.
It’s Hope that hurts.
Hurt that blinds.
Hope that deceives.
Because hand-in-hand with Hope comes Disappointment. Disappointment is the shadow that never leaves Hope’s side. Disappointment is omnipresent. But imperceptible.
And so we Hope.
We Hope oblivious to Disappointment. Until Disappointment makes her presence known. Until Disappointment brings hurt and pain and tears. And the we blame Love. We blame Love for the hurt and pain and tears. But it isn’t the fault of Love.
All blame should be laid at the feet of Hope. It isn’t Love that breaks hearts, it’s Hope.
Hope breaks hearts.